Colorless Tazaki

 Recently i am really immersed in reading books by Haruki Murakami  :)
At least only happy thing is happening recently in my life might be that i found my favourite writer. There was a time when someone asks me who the most favourite writer of mine is , i would say " i don't know ". The first novel i read was Norwegian wood , pretty simple story but still there is an unforgettable and unprocrastinating thing about  it, then there is Colorless Tazaki ,  Hard boiled end of the World , Kafka...
For me , a psychological conflict such as dream , desire , longing , fighting, countering , defeating and disappointing , feeling empty, winning , owning , satisfying .... emotions of someone is more real struggle than real life situation such as scarcity in financial situation or physiological hardship.
I really enjoyed reading his novel called " Colorless Tazaki ".
Tazaki is handsome,  son of well-being family in a small city in Japan , someone could appraise him for neither being too genius or too handsome , because everything he has from physical appearance till personalities and characteristics, there was nothing sharp thing about him , that would drive someone's attention into it.He was perfect average in life according  to his own perspective. In the end , there is nothing except yourself can describe yourself. When he was in a high school ,he was part of friend group which would consist of 5 people , later this friendship which has become only painful and happiest precious memory in his life. We call something which has reached the end as
" memory ".Such memories have somehow effect on our life and add colors to our who we are today.
By chance all of their names contained a colour. The two boys were called Akamatsu, meaning 'red pine', and Oumi, 'blue sea', while the girls' names were Shirane, 'white root', and Kurono, 'black field'. Tazaki was the only last name with no colour in it. 2 beautiful girls and 3 boys who are all in early age of puberty had friendship they were all reluctant to exchange this friendship with short aged teenage love drama , in order to protect it , they were all making efforts individually even by postponing flame in heart toward each other. There was harmony in the group , everything is peaceful and all were happy to enjoy this companionship. After school, 5 friends would enjoy time together , hanging out , studying or organizing volunteering works for primary school students. Sometimes there is harmony between people you can't describe with words. That harmony existed between them. If it is 2 people , it might easy to convince one another into harmony, but if it's 5 people , we should call this harmony " amazing". Actually while i was reading the novel,i was jealious of their friendship.But , deep inside , Tazaki was feeling that he was feeling unlike other 4 friends , he saw himself as no fit to their  group and colorless. Everyone has triggering stimulus to draw people into them , White is beautiful girl , with black long hair , slim body feature , she had talent to play piano with ultimate sensitive feeling of the melody , but this talent wasn't enough to  compete with outer world in professional field , Black is also lovely girl and royal friend of White , lively and outgoing , people would always see them going hand in hand , people might compare them . Red was real future sportsman , Blue was math genius.
Tazaki was average on everything , that's what he felt all the time. Only desire he longed for was maybe to be engineer to build rail stations, he enjoyed staring at rail stations. After high school graduation, 4 other members willing to stay in their small city , to protect their amazing friendship maybe was also unseen reason for unwillingness to abandon their hometown. Fear ! Fear to know that there plenty of other options in the world , actually once we leave our original place , we never turn tback to that point because freedom of choosing among options trigger  our greediness, we want more and more , if we can't get it , we will be disappointed . Tazaki wanted to go to Tokyo , to study more.Because of lack of ambition , even though he had many chances to go abroad or study abroad , he didn't go .Studying engineer at high prestige university in Tokyo was enough for him.
After he became student , his 4 friends continued their education in their hometown, still longing for their next meeting , maintained their friendship with his visit from Tokyo. But one day , without any explanation , his 4 friends told him the decision that they don't want to see him again in their friendship circle , suddenly a quiet loner, becomes estranged from his four childhood friends without explanation. We might realize something by reading good, or getting qualified education but main factor which adds color into life is actually " people around us " , suddenly Tazaki become colorless, ad his life become colorless, his everyday life continues only process through plans and actions without any emotions. He couldn't explain the feeling to himself , the feeling of sudden emptiness. He studied all his subjects , swimmed , read ,  enjoyed staring railroad stations, strayed in Tokyo alone. But after such big schock and hurtful memory, he couldn't dare to make friends with people , even strayed far from his family because going back to hometown would bring only memoeries of his friends who have abondened him wihtout explanation. His life continued like this till mid thirties, he made up his scars through long time, accostumed living aloner life, didn't question about it again. It seems to like his life is peaceful and monoton, no big trouble except hard wired scar in the heart, because he inherited father's real state in Tokyo , he worked as engineer at railroad station , building and somtimes repaiting them, doing his dream job. His past friendship case was closed until that day he met this special woman in his life.
Sarah, she 's works at travel agency , interesting woman with wide extension, different colors in her life,to compare with Tazaki.Their relationship is going well but the wall dividing people from himself, which Tazaki has built up because of his childhood scars was standing between them .Sarah knew that wall should recked down by his finding answer from his childhood friends. Yeah tha's so true , we forget our past , and continue but we forget the fact that it has still enormous effect on us , burden on us, till we fix them. I also don't like novel which ends with" happy ever after" wihtout leaving cliche of  contineous. That's why i really liked ending too.
... he goes to Finland , to find asnwer .to find his own color , his color was love and respect of his friends toward him ,worth of being loved and being respected by our loved ones. That makes our life colorful....
the thing is that "existence in mind of  someone we love " is our real existence in reality.Existing only in our world might have end up in our world without acknowledgement of anyone.That's why need friends , really real friends .

Red haired woman by Orhan Pamuk

i came to the conclusion recently that there is no secret in human life in this world if you think carefully and observe one logically.3 years ago, when i was taking German class , classroom teacher once told me that you find that person very interesting and irresistibly attachable? well no matter how interesting that person is , in one month , your feelings of craving will wear out and decrease and finally you will get to know him /or her.Deep down we're all same human beings with its own stories , background, culture, doubts , thought, problems and happiness.There is no magical mystery behind the scene which is calling you to come.After he said that i somehow find it easy to open up to strangers and initiate the conversation.The curiousity which belonged to me arisen by unfamiliar people from different background, abnormal actions or brave things , or even books with weird title,disappeared with time. Because i understood through time that those all abnormality belonged to broken soles.All those had its own reasons. Once ,i was too young to take notice in deep down from the surface of these things,But More i know people , more i travel , more i read , more i think , more i observe , the conclusion i made was so true. What i am saying is for example : one might look like very successful in life , owning all education everybody desires nowadays , all the status one might want to pursue...but behind the scene , there is time which she/he could have spent with loved ones, there is back up money and security and feeling of home supplied by parents , there is youth spent with strangers in stranger land ...
Despite all those sacrifice and investment , he's or she's/he's successful but broken inside , i should say it's not worth to the sacrifice. One should control herself or himself in order to maintain physical and psychological healthiness in life...Now all the normal things attracts me ... i like neither too social people nor too lonely people.The Excessive attitude , behaviour , action. thoughts are not attractive , it's only frightening...
In this novel , it was written in long and long narrative about relationship between father and son , and their first love was same woman , was red haired woman. According to my feeling i got while i was reading this book , son didn't realize actually what was missing in his life and yet felt incomplete all the time until he found his own father was different person from his acknowledgement since he was born.Feeling of incompleteness and emptiness ,when he was working as apprentice with Master Mahmut in order to dig well with old traditional methods, he somehow wanted to rebel against to his Master's will whom he's taken as father's model role. By providing food, money, and protection , his Master seemed to buy his freedom instead, freedom , with that, he can grow up with its own individuality and personality without taking after Master's viewpoint on life with his strict lectures of life.So while under process of struggling to find independent individual in himself , he was always in need of abandoning his Master right in the deepest point of digged dark hole of the well. That way, he can accomplish resentment toward his biological father who actually dedicated his life to not his son , but political and later love roads. Many years later , he found out that his eternal first love red haired woman had a baby son without his acknowledgement , he slowly realized that he turned out to be  like his own father without knowing , ended up abandoning his child for many years, was challenged again by his son, in battle of his son between being independent and being dependent on his father's wealth. In the end, he ended up being murdered by his son. Anyway, i didn't like and didn't understand murdering and arguement between father and son , father and grandfather. But only memorable and likeable thing left on my left side of brain is " Red haired woman said "- My hair color is my choice , while those women with red haired are natural.i liked her personality of not being imitatee, life is result of our logical choices. But in the end , who wins ? Imitatee , or those rebel doesn't want to imitate right things ? sometimes, smart women should know when to take after others , when to lead our main roles in our life ... otherwise , result wouldn't stand up on our side all the time. I am not gonna appraise her brave things she's done, or right to break her sole and body down with her choices which is obviously different from many other women out there in their society at that certain time period. It was her destiny created by her own hands.Most importantly , regret before we die is last we would want.
By the way , i saw glimpse of writer's Turkish behaviour in this novel , that judging people wholly only from the appearance , it's so funny that when you see someone with red haired , expecting that woman's head to be in the cloud ? that's just nonsense , come on, wake up ! it's just hair! and one more, thing , how could one possibly fall in love with someone without even talking , and stalking her and even imagining things which is totally crazy .I find them totally psycho. They're just so sick!

Hairla unensetgeleesee
Meder setgel hudlulteigeer
Sul doroi baigaadaa aih hereggui
Huchtei baigaadaa bardah hereggui
Yagaad gevel bugd l ankh ehelsen gazarluugaa butsah bolno
Zugeer l zurkh setgeliinhee gunruu ongiin haraad tend yu baigaag har
Ene bol togsgoliin ehlel bish
Ene bol ooriiguu oloh aylaliin ehlel
Ankh yaj delkhiid irsen ter l genen huuhed chamaig dotor chini olhiig chini huleegeed baij baigaa
Ankh ehelsen gazarluugaa gants udaa butsaad uz
Ineemeer baival ineej
Uilmaar baival uilj
Erkh chuluuteigeer ene amidraliinhaa zamd alh naiz mini
Busdiin yu gej helheer uuriiguu hyzgaarlahguigeeer
Zowhon ooriinhoo zamaar alhaj
Gants oldoj baigaa ene bolomjindoo busdiig buu oirtuul naiz mini
Huvi tavilandaa ooriigoo daatgaj zurkh setgelee daga
Ooriinhoo zamaar alhah ene tavilandaa bitgii buuj ug naiz mini!

:)

At that time I was just graduated from high school and I was so happy , what a relief to me ! Now looking back , I dont know why I dont have that feeling anymore ! I nearly forgot reasons made me unhappy during the long time at school. Instead, I regret not enjoying the 'best moments'- as everyone usually says so. I just recognize from myself that unhappy moments at the time it occurs will fade away very quickly when you look back after that. When you recall the past, most of the memories you would probaly remember are happy moments.....

Some people comment to me that I am so silent/quiet. There are many reasons
There are somethings that do not need to *say out loud*
I do not like showing off so much
Actions are more powerful than words (my sentence is again an example of *easier said than done* . Actually , I have not had any actions to prove that :( )
After all, It might be my weakness. Day by day, I am too shy to show my self, and it destroys my ability. That's why I am not good at communicating. Btw, I will try to improve it
It is so conflicted inside myself. Sometimes I really want to share my stuffs to someone but I am afraid to annoy/disturb them.
Within the world, I am just 'someone'
Within *someone*'s eyes, I am the world ( just hope that I have *someone* like that)
So, I think that I do not need to mind much about the 'world', how they judge me. Insteads I would rather take care for *someone* who really stand by me because they are also the world to me (just lets me know if you are *someone* :))
Just my thought (emotion rubb

ish) from the last night

short life !!!

on XXth birthday, i got hit by awareness that life is damn too short to be selfish and being myself , living only for myself! i can't even myself believe that after one more X years , i will be 30 which is crazy ... i am still immature and still working on personal development , my career, dream ,social circle and family.when i was coming to Turkey, i thought that EVERYTHING WILL BE IN ORDER AT AGE OF X.but still everything is just in process ? but on XXth birthday , i wondered does it ever become completed? no matter what stage in life we are , we are always unsatisfied , want more all the time...i said " we" because i don't wanna be " only one " who is unsatisfied. I am sure that everyone felt this way once in life.

I want to volunteer in Europe and Asia for a year or two after my graduation and internship.  One might say that Firstly help yourself ! then think about other ! . I will say "no" Because everything i want is endless, just too much ambition and ego to prove myself in social circle.
If it's possible i want to study more for master degree and postgraduate too. i want to travel around the world ! and volunteer more in South Asian countries ! i want to teach at university after fulfilling all my study for rest of the years.but God ! life is damn too short , my path is damn too slow to get what i want in shortest time to accomplish all i want, i want to live for 100 years or more to see what would happen in this world, how my homeland would change , meet many people, want to stay in their memory as favorable ... when i was a little like 5 or 6 , there is "one vivid memory " of kindergarten organized by my Korean teachers , they bought me cake and sang song together ... they were volunteers ... it was the most favorite memory in my age 5. I would like stay in someone's memory like this... life is too damn short to be selfish! God ! i want to live full and meaningfully ! if i leave this country for my homeland now, i will be selfish , i will get a job ,then after that, will want to promote , maybe then , i will build up my own family, then a child ! maybe to make my child go to college , i will start saving money, then pensioner maybe ambition i don't know! i will live for myself  for sure! But me in myself can't be happy like that , i don't wanna live like that, i want to help others that would make my foolish heart feel better.in the end , it's also for my own good, But alittle better selfish way!!!

on XXth birthday for my life, sudden thought hit me that life is damn too short to ignore or exclude people i don't like from my life.When i was a little , i always used to consider that people who is always smiling as a good person. But now i know that i can't read people on the surface, each one is going through fight in life everyday, i don't know what they're going through . So it's okey not to smile for me.At some point they shared memory and part in life with me , those people, i can't ignore them , can't close my eyes to them. even if i close my eyes , i can't shut down feelings what's coming to me.

Development Economics-3

Abramovitz : Catching hypothesis 
On the surface of the reason of delay in development is technology , but reason is actually social skill which has ability to absorb development quickly, social skills like politic environment , trade ,industry,education and finance. According to Abromovitz , how much country is in a high backwardness , this follower country (follows up technology in Developed countries ,copies them , or try to import them) has a high chance to catch up with D.C quickly.
 Those organism transmit technology to the country , international communication networks,multinational corporations,international trade and direct investment.Besides , these factors general macroeconomic situation such as morol hazard . legal environment matter . For example : India , as English speaking country colony, they have a leading role in customer service assisting to USA , While assisting they have become follower of high-tech.
After social skills had stood up on stale feet , development comes.

Perez and Soete : Window of opportunity

Does "being late in technology" have advantage ? more production is developed , product becomes more standardized . So all developing countries have to is produce standardized products without any pressure of innovating and investing in new technology.
To go over the restriction of technology can bring development in underdeveloped countries.

Gerschenkron :Differentiated System

Development and social skills have to come up simultaneously. At this stage , developed countries can become resource in various departments for developing countries. They could educated skilled labor force , and import technical information and knowledge to underdeveloped countries. So those countries in not enough budget can save up cost of research and development. To import tech and maintain importing , there is some special institutes needed. We can give few examples at this rate.
In Germany : there were investment banks
in Japan :there were called "zaibatsu" and "keiretsu " institutes
in South Korea : there were called " chaebols " private companies had a mission to carry out of importing tech and development.

development economics 2

Poverty descriptions
1. Absolute poverty-In order to survive from this poverty type , person must afford providing the minimum necessity to live on.
Minimum calorie amount which is 2700  ckal,and other stuffs like cloth , home,etc.
2.Relative poverty-There is always minimum salary limit or minimum cost of living in every society. If person earns less than those limits , that person belongs to relative poverty class.
3. Subjective poverty -it is measured by questionnaire made connection between level welfare and income level.
4.Human poverty-person doesn't have opportunity and options for sufferable life standard.This poverty exists including insufficient health care service ,  lack of pure drink water, education service is not enough, and lifespan is not that long compare to other developed country citizens.
Then have you ever wondered if those developing countries have a chance to catch up with rapid world development? but it seems to me impossible like turtle and rabbit competition for running. Let's see :)

we call difference between countries according to personal income statement " Development gap ".
What a kind of world are we living in ? /2009/
%16 Percent of world population lives in developed countries but they own % 72 percent of world trade / import+export/. We can classify these countries into 3 categories : European union
NAFTA -North American Free Trade Area- USA , Mexico , Canada
Japan and Far East countries .
By time passing , it has become more difficult to fill the " development gap " since developed countries are majoring in science and technology more and more , their productivity and personal income is increasing more and more. But economist didn't give up on hope of catching up  and they offered 3 kind of mechanism to developing countries.
Let's see what they offered
1.Developed countries-D.C invest a lot of money to create a new technology and let science to flowerish. On the other hand , there is developing country- U.D.C which didn't invest any money. With time passing technology innovated by D.C become outdated and old , they are again in search for  a new High- Tech. At that moment , chance to use former technology at reasonable cheap budget comes to U.D.C. More difference of costs to reach to the High - Tech get bigger , more advantage underdeveloped country can take from the situation.
2. Developed countries concentrate their resource on more High - Tech and Science At that time , underdeveloped countries will have opportunity to fill out  empty space created by developed country in agriculture and more traditional field.
3. In developing countries , they are more in need of Capital , high tech and science , So one investment in those field can bring increasing returns to scale. But in developed countries , they have flock of tech , science innovations. So even one new thing happens it can have a decreasing return to scale . So there's a chance to catch up for U.D.C.
IN next lesson i will tell about a few approaches to catching up in more details

Are you busy ?

Чи “завгүй” хүн мөн үү? Урдах ажлаа, төлөвлөгөө, зорилт, амжуулах гэж хичээж байгаа бүхнээ бодохоор “Надаас илүү завгүй хүн гэж хаа байх вэ” гэж хариулмаар санагдаж байгаа байх. Энэ асуултыг хэнд ч тавилаа гэсэн ингэж л хариулна. “Үгүй ээ, би бол дэлхийн хамгийн завтай хүн!” гэх нэг ч хүн гарахгүй гэдэгт мөрийцсөн ч яахав.

Хурдан өрнөлтэй өнөөгийн нийгэмд зүгээр суудаг хүн гэж үнэхээр хаана ч байхгүй болжээ. Бүгд л өглөөнөөс орой хүртэл тасралтгүй ажиллан, гар хөлөө хөдөлгөж байна. Бүх хүнд байгаа зүйл хэний ч давуу тал болдоггүй. Бүх хүн англи хэл мэддэг болчихвол “Би англи хэлэндээ сайн” гэж онгирох өөрөө утгагүй зүйл болчихно шүү дээ. Үүний адилаар, бүх хүн л завгүй байхад “Завгүй байна” гэдэг нь бусдаас 1%-иар ч болов илүү байгаагийн баталгаа болохгүй. Гэтэл ажиглаад байхад бид өөрсдөө ч мэдэлгүйгээр завгүй байдлаа “гавьяа”-д тооцон амьдарсаар байгаа билээ.

Америкийн философич Хенри Дэвид Торогийн “Дан ганц завгүй байх нь хангалтгүй. Тэрэндээ тулвал шоргоолжнууд ч гэсэн завгүй байна. Гол нь юу хийгээд завгүй байгаа нь л чухал” гэсэн үг бий. Орчлонгийн үй түмэн завгүй хүмүүсийг хооронд нь зөвхөн хийж байгаа ажлынх нь үр дүн л ялгаж байдаг. “Завгүй” гэдэг үг “Амжилттай” гэдэг үгийг орлохгүй болохыг ухамсартайгаар ойлгосон хүн л харамсах зүйлгүй амьдрах боломжтой ажээ.

Өөрийгөө завгүйд тооцсон залуучууд үүндээ гүн итгэж, шөнө бүр унтах нойроо хасан барин ямар нэг зүйлийг хийж, өөрийгөө чиглэн ирж буй бүх хүний өөдөөс “Би завгүй байгааг харахгүй байна уу?” гэсэн харцаар хариу барьж, нэг хүнтэй ярьж байхдаа ч дараагийн хүнтэйгээ ярих зүйлээ бодож, аль илүү яаралтай санагдсаныг нь санд мэнд барьж аван хийсээр өдөр өдрийг дуусгаж байна.

Яг л “завтай л байж болохгүй” гэдэг тушаал авсан юм шиг. Энэ хэв маягийн хамгийн дутагдалтай тал нь сүүлдээ илүү чухал зүйлсийг хойшлуулаад, чухал бишийг нь сонгож хийж байхдаа ч өөрийгөө “Би угаасаа завгүй л байна” гэдэг үгээрээ хуурдаг болгочихдог. Тэгээд дараа нь “Надад зав гарахгүй л байна шүү дээ”, “Би ямар хийх юмгүй суугаад байгаа хэрэг үү?” хэмээн “завгүй байдал”-аараа өөрийгөө бамбайлан, "бүтээмжгүй байдал"-аа хүлээн зөвшөөрөхгүйд хүргэдэг билээ.

Завгүй хүмүүсийн ихэнх нь өөрийгөө “Цагаа дэмий үрдэггүй” ангилалд багтаадаг боловч тэдэн дунд цагаа харин ч дэмий үрж байгаа, гэхдээ илүү стресстэйгээр үрж байгаа хүмүүс ч олон бий.

Чамаас 50 дахин илүү амжилттай амьдарч байгаа хүн чамаас 50 дахин завгүй байсныхаа хүчээр тэнд зогсож байгаа юм гэж үү? Эсвэл чамаас 50 дахин үр бүтээлтэй байсныхаа хүчээр үү? Энэ асуултын хариултыг математикийн жишээгээр ч тайлбарласан болно. Арифметик прогресс, геометр прогрессийн аль алийг нь нэгхэн тэмдэгтээр бүтээдэг. Нэмэх эсвэл үржүүлэх. Аль ч тэмдэгтийг нь бичихэд ижил цаг хугацаа шаардагдах боловч, нэг нь нөгөөгөөсөө хэд дахин илүү утгыг бий болгох чадвартай шүү дээ.

Could you point me towards
A quiet gathering
Full of bugs and holes
Where any word said to you
Holds a liquored, puzzled truth

It's just a habit

If I slur a bit
It's just because I'm confused
Don't think much of it
My days belong to you
If you're kind, my nights can too

Perfect for each other - durtai oguullegee orchuulj bichlee

Also , Meike und Torsten , die zwei, ...einfach ideal. Ja daas gibt es noch. Wie schön İhre Hobbys , İhres İnteressan,fast ideantisch.Beide reisen gern.beide sind Naturfreund ,und beide gehen gerne aus ins Kino ,ins Konzert,ins Restaurant.
Er liebt İtalienisch Essen ,sie auch.Beide interassen sich für moderne Kunst.Sie mag Picasso.Er auch.So viel gemeinsam!Einfach perfekt !
Natürlich gibt es auch Unterschiede.Aber das macht ja nichts. Das ist absolut normal.Sie liebt Woody Allen.Er findet ihn ein bisschen neurotisch. Na und ! er kann auch mal eine Woody Allen film sehen.İst doch klar.Er mag Krimis. Die gefallen ihr nicht so. Aber es gibt auch intellegente Krimis , das stimmt schön.Alles eıne Frage der Tolleranz. Diese Unterschiede sind kein Problem.im Gegenteil,Man hat ein Thema für ein gutes Gespraech,für eine interrasante Diskussion. Auch mit dem Berufen ist das so.Er ist  Lehren am Gymnasium und hat immer lustige Anekdoten aus der Schule.Sie ist Journalisten trifft oft interresant und wichtige Persönlichkeiten aus Politik, Sport,und Kultur.Manche Unterschiede sind sogar Komplementaer.Er kommt früh nach Hause und kocht gerne . Sie kommt spaeter und spült gerne ab.Aber sie hasst Büguln,und ihm macht Büguln richtig spass.Fantastisch oder?
Zum Putzen haben beide keine Zeit ,aber da kann ja eine Putzfrau kommen . Ganz einfach!
Auch ihre Staerken sind komlementaer.Sie ergaenzen sich wirklich super,sie ist İnformatik experten,er ist bei Computern immer noch ein totaller Anfaenger.Aber er Regale zusammen bauen und Fahrraeder reparieren , und da hat sie zwei linke Haende.
Also wirklich ,wie Yin und Yang,die beiden.Sie denken sogar synchron,das ist fast wie Telepathie. Sie sitzt manchmal in Autound denkt. Sie wartet er irgendwie auf mich. Und er liegt in diesem Moment auf dem Sofa in Wohnzimmer und fragt sich ; Wann kommt sie endlich ?
Natürlich gibt es auch andere Unterschiede. Nicht so komplementaer.Aber auch kein Problem.Jeder hat seine Freiheiten und das ist gulf Montags spielt er mit seinen Kollegen,sie macht eine Yoga kurs. Mittwochs trifft sie meistens ihre Freundinnen,er bleibt zu Hause und liest oder sieht fern.
İm Kaufhaus geht sie sofort zur Mode und er zu den Büchern. Sie mag Schuhgeschaefte ,ihn machen diese Laden nervös. Aber sie kann ja gute schön Scuhe kaufen.
Am Wochenende ,faehrt sie manchmal zu ihrer Mutter und er besucht seine Eltern. Aber oft sie beide in die Berge im Sommer wandern,im Winter Ski fahren.
Was für eine Harmonie ,nicht wahr ? Absolut İdeal.
Und es gibt noch mehr Parallelen ... was ? noch mehr ?
Nun , beide wohnen in Muenchen.
Sie können sich nicht !
Wie schade !
Meike and Torsten are just simply perfect for each other...how wonderful it is to find someone who is  like other half of you... their hobbies and their interests are almost identical...Both enjoyed travelling , both are nature friendly people, both loved going out for Restaurant , Film, and Concert.He loved Italian dishes . She does either.Both are interested in Modern Art. She loves Picasso.He does either. So many common things. Simply just Perfect!
Of course, there were some differences between them.yeah but that wasn't problem at all/ On the other side , it was rather quite normal to be different , 2 individuals.She loved Woody Allen. He found Woody Allen a little bit neurotic. yeah but sometimes, he would watch his movies too.He loved Criminal movies.She didn't love that kind of tenderness in the movie that much. But yeah who doesn't love intelligent adventurous Criminal series ?
Just a little tolerance can solve all the problem of differences.Those differences were complementary  rather than making problem.These differences would invite  a nice long conversation between them , it would become the topic of discussion. About their professions , it was applied also. He taught at Secondary school, had always funny stories from school. She was Journalist and met many interesting and important people, encountered variety personalities from the field of Politic, Sport, and Culture.  Sometimes those differences would be really complementary. He would come home early and enjoyed cooking. She would come later and would wash dishes.But while she hate ironing clothes,he found ironing clothes enjoyable and made it fun. isn't it fantastic to be like putting puzzle in a right places ?
They both didn't have to clean and hired cleaning lady. Very simple !
Even their advantageous powers were complementary.She was really expert at Information and IT. Opposite of this , he was always total beginner at Computer science.But he was talented at making furniture and repairing motorcycle, machine ,and bike, technical stuff.It was like Yin and Yang sides .
They both were synchro. There was telepathic feeling between them. When she sometimes sits in
Auto , thinks that he would be waiting for me somewhere. At this moment , he lies on the sofa of guestroom , thinks that when would she come ?
of course, there were other differences too which is not so complementary.But it wasn't problem at all.Everybody needs some space of their own and that is for sure. On Mondays, he loved playing basketball with his buddies. She loved participating in Yoga course.On Wednesdays, She would mostly hang out with her friends outside, He would like to stay at home, reading or just watching TV.
When topic comes to shopping, she loved going shopping, mostly for clothes or books.Specially she loved designed shoes , shoes business was one of her favours to see or to buy. It would make her simply thrilled and happy. On Weekends , she would visit her mom,.he would visit his parents.But they both loved being near to nature, would go skiing in the winter or hiking in the mountains in summer .
For what was this Harmony, isn't it true ? Absolutely ideal for each other.
And there was one more parallel thing in their lives ... what ? really? again similarities ?
yeah, they both lived in Munich.
They both were singles.
They both didn't know these facts about them , and didn't know each other.
HOW FUNNY WORLD IT IS FOR SURE !

We stared at the house for a while . The weird thing about houses is that they almost look like nothing is happening inside of them , even though they contain most of our lives. I wondered if that was sort of point of architecture.We always hide our true feelings when it is most necessary time to be consoled. We hide our loneliness , we hide our dreams in case if i say it out loud , one might think that i am overestimating myself or underestimating myself , we hide sadness , we hide feeling of not belongings like "house" which always look same from the outside like nothing is happening.We hide ourselves inside house -body inside house. From the beginning was it point of GOD to create us like that? i wonder sometimes...Sometimes it is just so strange to look at people like that. "Asking for help might kill your pride but it can't really in real situation since we live once " ...Anyway i don't wanna be that house...

Ajild oroh uil yvts = How to find your job replacement effectively after the graduation ?

1. Коллежийнхоо төвд очоод мэргэжлийн ажилтантай ярилцаарай. Виртуал нөөц чухал ч гэсэн таны ажил гацсан юм шиг санагдаж байгаа ч албан тушаалын зөвлөгөө авч, таны стратегийг сайжруулах мэргэжилтэн, онцгой хүмүүс болон ажил олгогчидтой уулзах хэрэгтэй. Нэмж хэлэхэд эдгээр мэргэжилтнүүд таны резюме, cover letter-ээ засварлаж бичихэд тань тусална. Ингэснээр та дэмжлэг авч, ажил хайх явцдаа том өөрчлөлт хийх боломжтой болно.

2. Хувийн “СВОТ” шинжилгээ хий. Та өөрийнхөө давуу талыг мэдэж, тэдгээрийг хэрхэн хөшүүрэгдэж, ажил олгогч, байгууллагадаа хэрхэн хурдан нөлөө үзүүлэх эсэхээ бататгах нь чухал. Та үнэхээр хийж чадахгүй зүйлдээ шударга байгаарай. Тэгээд өөрт байгаа дутагдалтай тал, ур чадваруудыг хэрхэн суралцах талаар төлөвлөгөө гаргах нь чухал. Үнэндээ бол таньд онцгой туршлага байхгүй бол хурдан суралцаад цааш алхах хэрэгтэй.

3. Зорилтот ажил олгогчийг стратегитайгаар сонго. Маш олон залуу боловсон хүчнүүд том алдаа гаргадаг. Тэд ганцхан салбарт эсвэл өргөн хүрээг хамарсан ажилд өргөдөл гаргадаг. Хамгийн үр дүнтэй арга бол сонирхож байгаа болон өөрсдийн хийж чадах ажлынхаа талаар өөр өөр салбарт ажил хайх явдал юм. Жишээ нь, та сошиал медианы стратегич гэсэн ажилд өргөдөл гаргаж байгаа бол өргөн хүрээний харилцаа холбоо бүхий компаниудыг сонгож болно. Гэхдээ та энэ төрлийн боломжуудыг өсөн нэмэгдэж байгаа хувийн болон ашгийн бус байгууллагуудаас хайх боломжтой.

4. Ажлын хайлтаа ажлын зар эсвэл ижил төстэй сайтуудаар хязгаарлах хэрэггүй.

Ажлын зах зээлийн тухай болон энэ категорит багтах олон мянган ажлуудад эргэлзэх хэрэггүй. Та төгсөгчидтэй холбогдох, Twitter дээр байгуулагууд дагах, компаний “албан тушаал” гэсэн хуудас дагах, харилцаа холбоо бий болгох эсвэл байгууллагын өргөжүүлэлтийн төлөвөлөгөө буюу шинэ үйлчлүүлэгчээр орж, хэлэлцүүлгийн утга учиртай агуулгыг унших гэх мэт зүйлсээс олон төрлийн зүйлийг суралцаж чадна.

5. Би таны харилцаа холбоог бий болгохын ач холбогдолд бухимдахгүй. Үүнд чанартай бөгөөд тоон үзүүлэлт бүхий өгөгдлийн дэмжлэг нь амжилттай ажил хайлт бүрийн гайхалтай зөвшилцөл юм.

Мэргэжлийн хувьд туршлагатай болсноор өөрийн хүрээлэлд байгаа хүмүүст нөлөө үзүүлж болно. Түүнчлэн LinkedIn профайлаа сайжруулж, таньд тус нэмэр болох мэргэжилтэн, найз нөхөдтэй холбох бусад платформуудыг хэрэглэх нь чухал.

6. Үнэнч сэтгэл, мэдлэг, байгууллагын төлөө ажиллах хүсэл тэмүүллээ өргөдөл гаргасан ажлын ярилцлагандаа бататган харуулах хэрэгтэй. Маш олон ажил олгогч нар онцгой ур чадвартай хүмүүсийг хайдаг гэж ярьж байсныг би сонсож байсан. Тэд байгууллагад нь үнэхээр сайн ажиллаж чадах шинэ төгсөгчдийг хайдаг. Жэйн Дэй коллежийн элсэлтийг хариуцдаг байсан бөгөөд өөрсдийн ур чадвар, өөрсдийн гэсэн брэнддээ хайртай оюутнуудыг хайдаг байв. Маш олон хүний нөөцийн мэргэжилтнүүд ч бас үүнтэй адил ажил горилогчдыг эрэлхийлж байдаг. Тиймээс ажил хайх явцдаа компанидаа өөрийгөө харуулах замыг олох хэрэгтэй.

7. Таны сошиал медиа, онлайн төрх мэргэжлийн харагдаж байгаа эсэхийг бататгах нь чухал. Танай найз нөхөд таны агуулга, контентонд хандаж байгаа эсэхийг бататгах тохиргоог ашигла. Гэхдээ та юу постолж байгаагаа анхаар. Найзууд тань ч зураг, постыг тань олон нийтэд гаргаж байхыг үгүйсгэхгүй. Ямар ч ажил олгогч зохисгүй авирлаж болох шинэ ажилтныг авахыг хүсдэггүйг сана. Байгууллагынхаа зарим эрсдлийг үнэл.

8. Аппликэйшн, утасны харилцан яриа, ярилцлага зэргээ хяна. Ажил олгогч нар өөрсдийг нь бусдаас ялгаруулах, мэргэжлийн болон тухайн бусдаас ялгарах боломжийг жинхэнээсээ батлан харуулах ажил горилогчыг хайж байдаг.

Ажил хайлт бол ажил хайх явц. Амжилтанд хүрэх замд урам хугарах явдал ч гарна, бусдын дэмжлэг талархлыг ч хүлээх явдал тохионо. Таны мэргэжлийн албан тушаалыг эхлүүлэх боломжийг олгох анхны бөгөөд гайхалтай шинэ ажилдаа орж, таныг идэвхижүүлж, шаргуу ажиллах туршлагыг ойлгох нь чухал. 

Fault in our stars

Many of you might have already watched the movie and read the book , but still ,if there is someone who likes sharing viewpoint and tries to make meaning out of it, welcome to the overview of " Fault in our stars "as version of mine.So here we go-
How many people on the world instead of living , just kill time ?

How many people on the world ignore the simple beauty in life , beauty in just being alive and being human ? But of course, it is always not enough to be just human , dreams, goals, desires, ambition, love keep pushing us on the road in order to be more unsatisfied and satisfied....if we're unsatisfied , we keep moving and moving  escaping from the reality, refuse to find beauty in moment. 

How many of us uses advantages of those capacity of human being in a right way?
we keep complaining and complaining....do we stop and enjoy the moment ever? 
do we direct our capable emotions into the happiness ever? 
do we pursue to feel the happiness around us ever?
What makes us wanting to live more ?

To me,  i forget from time to time, since i am young and all i have is time, who can say that i am wasting it ? 
what i am trying to say is not that while we have a chance, let's live it to the fullest. The point is to live meaningfully, meaningful in the moment ,meaningful for the long term.Then we wouldn't have so much regret before dying.
These kind of endless questions came to my mind after i had finished reading the book.
Hazel Grace, 17 years old, have no choice, but to live just her daily life in ritual circle which packed up with endless doctor appointments, reality shows on the sofa, taking unpleasant medicine everyday, reading books, carrying around Philips which is named by her,equipment supporting her breathing , already gave up fantasies of love because of Thyroid cancer.It was a kind of very sad to compare myself to her, because while she was dying, i have many years to live on just according to my expectation.
 But we had same symptom which is depression.There was joke in past that women feel better when they see ugly one. I really don't wanna be one of them but yeah we had same depression. Because of social interaction lacking, of course she had more problems than those are described here. To her, depression is side effect of dying, to me , depression is not being able to find someone who can understand me and not being in deep soul touched friendship. On the surface , i might look like someone who has many friends, but inside , i am depressed really... anyway With her doctor and her mother's advice, Hazel Grace is convinced to attend The Support Group which is a kind of meeting with same problem to share their stories ,to comfort and encourage each other in the social interaction. There begins not a story of simple boy meets girl, simple story of beautiful love and life.

to be continued...

"Хатэна" компанийн захирал Үмэда Мочио Japanese Technology Professionals Association-аас зохион байгуулсан Silicon Valley Tour (АНУ-ын Калифорниа муж улсын Силикон Валлид Google-ээс эхлээд мэдээллийн технологийн компаниуд олноороо байдаг)-т оролцогчдод зориулж ийм нэртэй семинар удирдан явуулсныгаа өөрийнхөө блогт бичсэнээс товчлон хүргэж байна.

Миний бие түүний "Web進化論 (Вэбийн хөгжлийн онол)" хэмээх номыг яг одоо уншиж байгаа юм. Google, Web 2.0, Open Source гээд олон зүйлийн тухай бичсэн энэ номыг та япон хэл мэддэг бол заавал олж уншаарай.

Дээд зэргийн ажил хийдэг хүмүүст байдаг ерөнхий шинж чанар

Тэдний гол онцлог нь 10, 20 жилийн турш өдөр тутам, өдөржингөө, маш урт хугацаанд ямар нэг зүйлийг үргэлжлүүлэн хийх чадвартай байдаг. Бусад хүмүүс тэднийг хараад "Пөөх, ямар хэцүү ажил вэ!" гэж хэлэхээр зүйлийг ч тэд хэцүү гэж огт боддоггүй. Түүнчлэн тэд амжилт, алдаа зэрэг гаднаас харсан үнэлэлтүүдэд анхаарлаа хандуулдаггүй байх нь олон. Улам бүр өрсөлдөөн нь ширүүсч буй бизнесийн талбарт амжилт олсон хүмүүсийг ажиглаад байхад, тэдэнд "өрсөлдөөн" гэдэг ойлголт огт байдаггүй мэт санагдана.

Жишээлбэл, Silicon Valley-д хагас дамжуулагчийн venture company байгуулан ажиллаж буй Ватанабэ Сэй-ичирогийн хобби нь машин техник засах гэнэ. Найз нөхдийнхөө эвдэрхий машин техникийг цуглуулан зассанаар тэр стрессээ тайлдаг юм. Зарим хүн түүнийг хобби, ажил хоёрыг нь зааглахын аргагүй гэж тодорхойлох нь ч бий. Их идэх тэмцээнд түрүүлэхийн тулд тэмцээний завсар хооронд ходоодоо амраах биш, идэхээ үргэлжлүүлсэн нь ялдаг гэлцдэг. Үүнтэй адилхан жишээ тун олон. Linux-ийг бий болгосон Линас Торвалдсын хувьд программ бичих гэдэг ажил нь ч, хобби нь ч юм. Ажил дээрээ ч, гэртээ ч программ бичих нь бусдын хувьд хэцүү санагдаж болох ч түүний хувьд энэ нь мэдээжийн зүйл аж.

"Чаддаг байх", "дуртай байх"-ын ялгаа

Сайн сургуульд орсон оюутнуудад мэргэжлээ сонгох болсон шалтгаан нь "дуртай, болмоор байсан" бус, "чаддаг" байх нь түгээмэл ажиглагддаг. Тэд сургуулиа төгсөөд гүнзгий бодож эргэцүүлэлгүй нэг ажилд орж, түүнийгээ үргэлжлүүлсээр тэтгэвэрт гарахынхаа өмнө "Би энэ ажилд үнэхээр дуртай байсан уу?" хэмээн өөртөө асуулт тавин харамсдаг. Нас өндөр болсон хойноо ийм харамсал тээхийг хэн ч хүсэхгүй нь ойлгомжтой.

Ингэхэд би гэж чухам хэн юм бэ, ямар нөхцөл байдал байхдаа би аз жаргалыг мэдрэх вэ, бусдын амжилтанд атаархахгүйн тулд би өөрөө ямар болох ёстой вэ? Мэдээж хариултыг олоход тун төвөгтэй хэдий ч, өөрөөсөө ингэж асуухаа зогсоож огт болохгүй.

Дуртай зүйлийнхээ талаар өөрийнхөө чадварыг голж болохгүй. Алдаанаасаа суралцаж, түүнийгээ засч явсаар шилдэг нь болдог шүү дээ. Өөрийн хамгийн чухал шийдвэрийг гаргахдаа бусдын нөлөөнд авталгүй, үргэлж эрэл хайгуул хийж байх нь чухал.

30 хүрэхээсээ өмнө энэ бүхнийг үргэлж бодож, эрэл хайгуулаа үргэлжлүүлбэл "тэнгэрээс заяасан" ажил чинь олдох л болно. Хүнд хэцүү өрсөлдөөнийг ялж гарах түлхүүр нь "Би хийдэг ажлаа л хийж байсан шүү дээ, огт өрсөлдөе гэж бодоогүй" гэж хэлж чадахаар ажилдаа дуртай байх явдал юм.

Үнэхээр "Би чаддаг юм чинь хэнтэй ч өрсөлдөж ялж чадна" гэж бодох, "Би дуртай учраас хэзээ нэгэн цагт ялж чадна" гэж бодох хоёр ялгаатай ажээ.